Random Thoughts and Musings

June 29, 2000 I received a phone call that would alter my way of thinking forever. My stepfather, who I had never heard cry before, was sobbing into the phone. I couldn’t imagine why he was calling and not my mother, because he hadn’t really spoken to me since I moved out in 1993. My immediate thoughts were that something happened to Mom, and I started screaming questions hysterically into the phone.

He finally managed to control his sobbing enough to get out a broken “Steven,” and suddenly I saw it: a horrible car crash, my sweet 16-yr old brother flying through the air, carnage everywhere. I don’t know why I didn’t get the vision before, though it doesn’t surprise me. I’d really only had a true psychic connection with my mother & sister before. I do suspect the reason I had chosen THAT day to get completely f’d up with the guys from work was because I knew something was going to happen (I had spent the previous three years drinking with the guys, but avoiding the “drunk” state).

I immediately got a ride back to my command, went to my OIC & requested emergency leave. They also arranged flights for myself and my then-4-year-old daughter. Next, I called my best friend, who told me she’d drive up to GA immediately, though I told her to wait a day or two (it was her daughter’s 1st birthday, and they were in the middle of the party). Finally, I called my friend who was caring for my daughter that weekend, and told her to meet me at the airport (and why). I threw some stuff into a bag and headed south to the airport.

When i told my daughter why were were going back to GA so suddenly, she burst into tears and demanded to speak with God. I told her she can talk to God any time, she just has to speak, and he hears. She said, “You bring my Uncle Steven back here! He’s a good boy. I want him back here now!” I couldn’t help but laugh at her innocent demands. My poor girl had suffered her first loss of a relative, and was handling it remarkably well.

I got to GA and my stepfather was there to get me, a neighbor had driven him to the airport so that he would be safe. We grabbed our luggage and headed back to the house, where my mother clung to me and wailed, “He’s gone, Angel! Our little boy is gone! Our son is gone! You were his mother, too. You helped so much with the kids. I’m so sorry, Angel … we should have protected him better.” This proclamation broke my heart all over again - it is the first time either parent acknowledged the fact that I basically raised my two siblings because they were always working.

My daughter, so compassionate in nature, would come to me whenever she saw someone crying and tell me where they were so I could go hug them. She drew pictures to make people smile, and sat in one spot for hours on end so she wouldn’t get in anyone’s way or upset my stepfather (who is a nervous person anyway, and can’t stand for children to move around).

The memorial service was beautiful: and almost completely planned by my then-18-year-old sister. She had to handle just about everything from the moment they realized Steven was missing til the moment we spread his ashes in the Destin Pass on July 4, 2000.

For some reason, I have a hard time talking about my brother’s birthday ON his birthday .. and that is why this isn’t posting until the 27th. So, happy birthday yesterday, Steven. We love you, we miss you, and we hope you’re playing all-stars up in Heaven.

xoxoxox

Note: Steven, along with 3 other boys, died in a car accident. The boy who was driving and the other boy in the front seat were 17; bother Steven and the boy in the back seat with him were 16. They’d just gone around the corner to grab a burger … but met with a horrible accident on their way home. Please, please please make sure the roads that your children drive are safe and properly engineered. These boys would be alive if the road had been designed properly (it has been shown in studies that the boy driving was being safe, the road itself was incorrectly draining water into the center of the road instead of off to the side).   

Those of you who know me well know that I have always wanted to be brave enough to buy an RV, pack my Tween up, save up a couple of thousand bucks, and start traveling the U.S. There are websites all over the place that people who are much braver than I who have done such things … even with kids in tow!! How amazing is that? I often wonder what it would be like to truly experience traveling across the U.S.

Two people who I’ve come to adore, who remind me greatly of my younger brothers and who make me think fondly of my younger years and the people I knew in them are getting ready to make such a journey. You’ve heard (read) me speak (typing) about my Twitter friend @jacklhasa. He introduced us to his personal friend, @scarab (also on Twitter). Both are young (v.e.r.y. young [in years] in @scarab’s case), searching for personal fulfillment and enlightenment, and willing to blog about all the gory details. What more can we ask for?

I personally can’t wait to read about their adventures, their triumphs, their downtimes [because while we all know there will be some struggle, I pray there will be no tragedies to write home about], and their thoughts. I hope all of you join me in supporting them, whether it be through Paypal donations [address is jackstravelfund at yahoo dot com] or simply enjoying Jack and Scarab’s travel blogs.

I think this quote sort of fits what I was blogging the other night. Thanks, A, for finding it. <3

Just because you love someone doesn’t mean you have to be involved with them. Love is not a bandage to cover wounds.

Hugh Elliott, Standing Room Only weblog, February 16, 2004
Author of the Standing Room Only Weblog (http://blogs.salon.com/0001573/).

Today was my first full day at Cal’s. I wasn’t sure what to expect, I wasn’t sure if I was going to like it once I’d been on my feet for 5 hours, and I wasn’t sure if they would like me. I come off as sweet and innocent when you first meet me, because I’m quiet and like to get a feel for the lay of the land. Once I’m in my comfort zone, I give as good as I get - and better. I know most people don’t expect it, and many people don’t like when their own medicine is dished back out to them!

I was also unsure about working with SwiftLink, the system they use for everything. It actually wasn’t too bad, and I learned quite a bit because we were one person short and VERY busy!

Each time I met with them last week, the owners told me that the business had been very slow for months, and that they were straining to keep up, but that they knew the potential was there and wanted to stay on top of their game. Today, everyone kept staring in wonder and saying, “What in the world? Where did all this business come from?” because we had no less than 30 customers walk through the door (this is a lot for a small-town, small appliance store!), plus all of the service calls coming over the phone. Incredible! It really set me up to be able to dig in and get my hands dirrrrrty!

Overall assessment: I’m still excited to go back to work tomorrow, and I still think I’m going to love this job.

**** DISCLAIMER (added 3.16.08) I am a DIVORCED woman … I do know about the trials, tribulations, and impulses that come with love and marriage. I speak from the heart in this post …

How many people, do you think, know the difference between attraction and love?

I often see people who hold strong attractions to one another ‘hook up’ and sometimes ‘get hitched.’ I question, almost every time, whether they truly love one another … or whether they simply feel a connection that they don’t understand, and assume it is love.

With the rising rates of divorce in the US and other countries, isn’t it apparent that not many people know what love truly is? I get sick of hearing the same story. Sue and Johnny meet. They date. They live together. They get married. One week, Sue loves Johnny: he’s the greatest man alive, she would do anything for him, he is the sun that lights her life. The next week, Sue hates Johnny: she never wants to see him again, he’s the lowest scum on earth, he’s a horrible person. Sue never speaks to Johnny again.

Was this love? In my opinion, no.

I will concede that people change. I will also concede that people hide their habits from a new ‘date/lover/significant _other/spouse’ for as long as possible. I will ALSO concede that as each person discovers more about their ‘date/lover/significant _other/spouse,’ they tend to become disenchanted and less infatuated, and they will find more things to not like about a person than to like.

However, if it was “love” to begin with, wouldn’t the love in the relationship smooth out some of the rough edges? And wouldn’t the love cause the people to look past as many of the less enchanting features as possible, and focus on the good, the positive, the things that made them fall “in love” in the first place?

I can not cut the people I love out of my life entirely, unless they have done something to DELIBERATELY hurt me. When I break up with a guy (or he breaks up with me [winces while thinking of A from CA, the only man to truly break my heart]), I may have to distance myself from him for a short period (a year, at most) to gather my thoughts and refocus on my future. However, once I have set my life on track again, I welcome him back into my life as a friend, a contact, a person to touch base with now and then because I love him and I want to know he is doing well (or not, in which case I do what I can to help without getting sucked back into an unhealthy relationship). This take on ex-relationships means, of course, that my new relationships always have to adjust to the fact that I don’t talk bad about my exes, I don’t stop them from calling me when they need/want to talk (which is really not a problem … they treat me like they do most friends, and call a few times a month/year depending on where they/I live and how likely it is we would run into each other around town). I also meet up with them whenever possible, meet their new girlfriends, wives, kids, etc. I send housewarming gifts, birthday cards, holiday cards & emails, etc.

My exes are some of my closest friends. This makes sense to me, because I let them into my life in a way that most people - even my best friend - have never been let into my life. We’ve shared a bed, we’ve made love, we’ve seen each other at our best and our worst. Of course we have an intense connection, a personal vibe that nobody else understands. Does this mean i would repeat the relationship? Absolutely not (I say, with at least 99% conviction).

Why, you may ask? Since I have such strong convictions about once you love someone, you ALWAYS love them, I am often questioned about why I would not give a person I love so much a second chance.

My answer is this: I am not refusing the person a second chance, I am refusing the relationship a second chance. I would NOT leave a relationship without having given EVERYTHING I have to that person, in an attempt to keep the relationship alive, vital, and strong. I would also not leave a relationship without having given a person who wronged me in “forgivable” ways a second, third, and possibly fourth chance to correct their actions. (Unforgivable offenses are physical abuse of my daughter or myself, sexual abuse of my daughter, attempted murder of anyone … things along those lines are not forgivable in a relationship.)

So, if we come to the point where I end a relationship (something I find EXTREMELY hard to do), or it is ended for me (which has only happened once, thank goodness … I prefer to NOT have my heart destroyed unexpectedly), there is a reason - beyond our understanding and control - that the relationship is ended. Therefore, to repeat said relationship would only be asking for trouble in the long run. I like to learn from the trials and tribulations of my life, not continuously cycle through them and repeat them.

I know how easy it is to get caught up in the newness of a relationship: that intense attraction, the fuzzy feeling of warmth when you hear *that person’s* name, the memories that are built on minor details (the song, the movie, the restaurant), the tingling feeling from your scalp to your toes when you kiss or even just hold hands. Those things are lovely, wonderful, and necessary to the building of the relationship … but they are NOT love.

Love is enduring, it is a promise of forever - even if the context of the love must change, the love should always be there. Period. Love is wanting to be with a person in the downs just as much as when you’re cresting the top of the roller coaster. Love is going out at 3 a.m. when you have to be at work at 6 a.m. because the person you love needs cold medicine, and is so miserable he/she doesn’t want to wait. Love is welcoming the changes that a relationship goes through, because they are inevitable, and must be dealt with before the steady-happiness can be achieved.

Just as “Life is,” … “Love is.”

(Seriously, period.)

I have a friend, R, who I believe I originally met on ICQ years ago - about 11 years now, I think. (I’m 12145087, for those of you wondering.)

Anyway … he has this knack of taking sexy photos that hint at a lot, but don’t show much at all. I <3 those photos. I crave those photos. They are divinely, sublimely delicious.

I had the fortune of meeting R a few times. He intrigues me because

1. He’s still single. I don’t understand it, but he is. He must be ONE. PICKY. GUY. Cuz he’s a catch, ladies - fo sho! and
2. He can play the acoustic guitar and sing *drool* I <3 acoustic guitar players. I <3 singing. Can you say Yum? I can. YUM! and
3. He’s just … sexy. Simply, adorably, handsomely … sexy.

If it wasn’t a violation of his privacy, I would totally post one or two of the pictures here. YUM.

Why am i blogging about him? Because I can. because anytime he pops up on my Yahoo IM (via GAIM/PIDGIN, of course) (my profile), I think of that one night … not that one. Nope, not that one. Yes…that one. Scrumptious.

That is all.

I told my Twitter-bud, @tofu916, that I would work up his numbers and get them back to him.
I *could* just tweet him the numbers and links on Twitter. However, I took long enough to do this, so i want to make sure I’m as thorough as possible.

Your Life Path Number is 7:

The Life Path 7 suggests that you entered this plane with a gift for investigation, analysis, and keen observation. You are a thinker of the first order. You evaluate situations very quickly, and with amazing accuracy. As a result, you are thorough and complete in your work, the perfectionist who expects everyone else to meet a high standard of performance, too.

A Life Path 7 person is a peaceful and affectionate soul. But you guard your connection to people carefully. It’s easy for you to detect deception and recognize insincere people, and you avoid them. You aren’t one to have a wide circle of friends, but once you accept someone as a friend, it’s for life. It’s as if you must get to know someone a lot better before you allow the wall surrounding you to be penetrated. Chances are you are a very charming and refined individual with great poise and a quick wit. Nonetheless, there is an exclusiveness about you. You probably aren’t a very social person. Your reserve is often taken to be aloofness, but actually, it’s not that at all. It is merely a cover up for your basic feeling of insecurity. There’s no rush, It takes time for you to warm up to new friends. Clubs and organizations hold little interest for you; you are not a joiner.

You actually like being alone and away from the hustle and bustle of modern life. In many ways, you would have fit in better in much earlier times when the pace of life was less hectic. You need a good deal of quiet time to be with your own inner thoughts and dreams. You dislike crowds, noise, distractions, and confusion.

The overwhelming strength of the number 7 is reflected in the depth of thinking that is shown; you will garner knowledge from practically every source that you find. Intellectual, scientific, and studious, you don’t accept a premise until you have dissected the subject and arrived at your own independent conclusion.

This is a very spiritual number and it often denotes a sort of spiritual wisdom that becomes apparent at a fairly early age. A built in inner guide providing a strong sense of intuition may set you up as being a law unto yourself. Whatever spiritual position you take, whether traditional or bizarre, you will cling to it with fervor. Once you have decided an issue, it is almost impossible to get you to revisit the question. Adaptability is not your style, and change for you is a rarity.

You rely heavily on your experiences and your intuition, rather than accepting advice from someone. Your hunches usually prove to be very accurate, and knowing this, you follow the directions they seem to guide.

In the most negative use of the 7 energies, you can become very pessimistic, lackadaisical, quarrelsome, and secretive. A Life Path 7 individual who is not living life fully and gaining through experiences, is a hard person to live with because of a serious lack of consideration for others. There is such a negative attitude. Indeed, operating on the negative side of the 7 can produce a very selfish and spoiled individual and living with one can be a challenge. This may be why some 7s actually prefer living alone. If you have any of the negative traits they are very difficult to get rid of because you tend to feel that the world really does owe you a living or that in some way you are not being fairly treated.

Fortunately, the negative 7 is not the typical 7, at least not without some mitigating positive traits. This number is one that seems to have some major shifts from highs to lows. Stability in feelings may be elusive for you.

Reference:
http://astrology-numerology.com/num-lifepath.html

Looking at this chart, you can see how each letter of your name corresponds to a letter:

So, your name adds up like this:
2+6+6+3+4+5+3+1+4+6+6+9+5=60 and 6+0=6.

Your Destiny Number is 6:

The number 6 Destiny suggests that the direction of growth in your lifetime will be toward a greater sense of responsibility, love, and balance. Development in life must make you more helpful, conscientious, and capable of rectifying and balancing any sort of inharmonious situation. You must be a person very much inclined to give help and comfort to those in need. You have a natural penchant for working with the old, the young, the sick, or the underprivileged.

As the saying goes, charity begins at home, and the home is where you must be a special person. The qualities of the 6 make the finest and most concerned parent, and one who is often deeply involved in domestic activities. Openness and honesty is apparent in your approach to all relationships, particularly close family relationship. A happy home life is the goal of Destiny 6, and if you live up to the promises of this number, you will reap this reward most likely with some degree of luxury and grace.

Although you may have considerable creative and artistic talents, the chances are that you will devote yourself to an occupation that shows concern for the betterment of the home and of the community at large. The destiny of the 6 is often a career in medicine, welfare work, education, dealing in the arts, furniture, decorating, landscaping, home construction, religious endeavors, or scientific fields.

The positive side of the number 6 suggests that you are very loving, friendly, and appreciative of others. You have a depth of understanding that produces much sympathetic, kindness, and generosity.

Reference:
http://astrology-numerology.com/num-expression.html

To computer your Power Number, you add the numerical representation of your Life Path and the Numerical representation of your Destiny: 7+6=13, and 1+3=4.

Your Power Number is 4:

Reference: http://ezinearticles.com/?Numerologys-Power-Number—How-Life-Influences-Us&id=499191

There ya go darlin, all wrapped up all nice and pretty for ya

I treated myself to lunch at Taco Hell and a Sweet Tea from Top’s (a local burger joint with the BEST sweet tea in town!). While I was in the Top’s drive-through, the girls saw the boxes of cookies piled in my poor lil Jetta. They got all excited and started asking to purchase them.

Now, technically, our troop has NO MORE BOXES to sell. We didn’t even have enough to do booth sales with, because the first weekend in booth sales sold ALL the freakin cookies!

However, it just so happens that our Troop Leader sent out an all-call to say another troop had totally over-ordered their cookies and needed to get rid of them.

SO, I took an order for another 12 boxes of cookies. This puts my Tween at 12 boxes CLOSER to her goal of 600 boxes. Know what that means? THAT means that the troop can fenagle the rest of the sales so that she can actually get her goal prize: a digital camera. How cool is that? It’s nothing fancy, but she really wanted it, so I really wanted her to have it. I think she’s only like 18 boxes shy of the 600 now. If I hadn’t gotten the freaking FLU during the cookie sales month, she would have sold over 1000 boxes, easy. I mean, she sold 500 boxes in just FIVE days of sales! How awesome is that? She was a go-getter and I’m so proud!

Anyway, had to brag on mah gyrl cuz I’m proud! AND, had to send up another shout-out for the Blessing-filled week we’ve had!

WOOT!

Let me see if I can quit bouncing around long enough to blog this.

I went to my 2nd interview with the appliance store today. I met with the wifey unit, and we discussed everything from home schooling (which she does with their five kids) to impossible parents to medical benefits. I really think this interview was to see whether or not she and I would get along if we had to work side by side (not a likely possibility - she tries to keep her office hours at home, and I would be working in the office if I got the job).

Overall, we had a pleasant conversation. I always get nervous when someone speaks a lot about their Faith or the Bible, because while I am a Christian, and I do have a great deal of Faith, I do not like for anyone to put their religion or practices on me. I am not a Bible-studier. I feel my connection with God comes from my connection with God, not how many Bible verses I know (or, in my case, DON’T know). I pray, I attend Church, I get involved with causes to help others, I live my life in a manner which suggests I want to make life better for others, not just for myself.

We discussed money a little bit, and I told her that their payscale is lower than even the low end of what I wanted to accept from an employer, but that I would be willing to cross that line for their company. I just feel very strongly about this company, and these people.

The husband unit came into the office then, and we discussed my references, and the glowing reports he received from everyone (thank you, everyone!). They both said that their biggest concern is that I was looking at five years as long-term, whereas they would prefer I would be with them for the endurance of the business. I saw that as a good sign.

We spend some more time speaking a little about religion, about the Volunteer work I was always involved with in Jacksonville when I was in the Navy (Thanks, Sidyen, I love you dearly for bringing that up!), and how we can implement that into their business and not lose out on a lot of money.

We spent some time discussing where they hope the business will be in five years, where they hope I would fit into the business, and how they think I would be an asset to the company.

And then …

THEY OFFERED ME THE JOB!

I’m so incredibly pleased! They are even starting me at a few cents higher (in this small town, in this economy, the few cents makes a HUGE difference) than what they initially offered. I think by my 90-day review, I’ll be making at least as much as I wanted my minimum pay to be (which isn’t a lot, trust me). And, they do annual raises - guaranteed, paid holidays (the major holiday days), discounts on appliances (new or used), and they promised not to micro-manage me! WOOOT! It doesn’t get any better than this! Well, a $30k/yr paycheck would be better *L* but, in time, good things will come.

This week has been truly filled with blessings. First the house, then the job! YAY!!

I start tomorrow, because they have a “meeting” every Friday to discuss the previous week’s accomplishments and the next week’s goals. I’ll be meeting the rest of the crew, right away. AND, they provide breakfast biscuits and OJ. Woot!

The gentleman I hope to be working for soon has called TWO of my references in the last half-hour. WOOOT! This has to be a good sign, right? I have an interview with him & the wife unit (she runs the office portion, he runs the service calls & the technical portion - it is an Appliance Repair Shop) today in two hours.

Please, please, please let this be a good thing. PLEASE let this be the job I need. PLEASE! I’m so excited, I can hardly contain myself.

And, thanks to my Twitter bud @jacklhasa, I am rocking out to Lou Bega’s Mambo No. 5 (A Little Bit of…). WOOT! Sent, btw, via POWNCE - another tool ya’ll need to be grabbing if you don’t already have it (my profile here … but it is new, so not yet decorated!)

Pray, wish me luck, and cross your fingers please!!!

I’ve been slacking in the blog department lately, and since I JUST started the damn thing a couple of weeks ago, I am irritated with myself!!

So, I’ll tackle the last week or so a couple of bullet points at a time, in a couple of blogs over the next couple of days. How’s that sound? *grins* It sounds mighty fine to me, so that’s what we’re gonna do!!!

First of all, the Interviews.

JEEZ i cannot stand when someone says “We’re going to call EVERYONE back by Friday,” and they don’t.

A couple of weeks ago, I interviewed for a job that is really a perfect fit for me - benefits match what I want, hours are exactly what I want, pay is EXACTLY what I want. Of course, there were over 250 resumes submitted, and 50 interviews conducted. I, apparently, was not one of the three that were called back for the next tier of interviews. That sucked, and was a blow to my ego. I’ve really never interviewed and not gotten the job I interviewed for. I’m GREAT with interviews.

Last week, Tuesday, I interviewed with another company. No benefits, crap pay, no overtime or comp time … but I really wanted the job because I really WANT TO BE WORKING! Seriously now, I’ve had my fun. I’ve done my thing. I’m ready. I’m renewed. I’m anxious to be back in the office! SERIOUSLY!

Both jobs told me I’d hear by that Friday whether or not I’d be called in for the second interview or be hired for the job or if I was not the right fit at all. The first one didn’t contact me at all. Jerks. The Second one contacted me Tuesday to tell me another selection had been made, but if their budget allowed, they would keep me in mind for future positions.

Seriously? Because I’m willing to work for what I consider a pittance - half of what I’m worth .. maybe even less than half what I’m worth, depending on the area, the job requirements, etc. Someone is willing to work for less than that? They are OBVIOUSLY not a single parent. I don’t have a car payment, nor do I have credit card bills. But the money I’m willing to work for will barely cover rent (1/2 a house, even!!), bills (again, only 1/2 of the bills!), phone, gas, food, and insurance. i won’t have ANYTHING leftover for birthday or Christmas presents, weekend trips to the zoo, or even the movies. How can anyone make it on less than that? Jeesum.

Monday of this week, I received a telephone call from a very polite and considerate gentleman named Charles. He stated that his wife had emailed me Saturday night, and they hadn’t received a response, so he just wanted to call and speak with me for a moment. I explained that if they are not in my address book, their mail will go straight to SPAM and I only weed through those once or twice a month. Once we cleared that up, he asked if I could come in the next day for an interview. Of course!

Now, I remembered sending in my resume for this position about 4 weeks ago. I was interested SOLELY because it is a small company in a small town. For some reason, that is who I prefer to work for. Unfortunately, the way the economy is right now, any job I take is going to be a paycut. Even more unfortunately, working for a company like this means an even BIGGER cut in pay. I’m ok with that, as long as I make enough to pay rent and bills. We can go without fun for a while until things get better.

I went in and met with the gentleman, who was pleasant and polite, and spoke highly of his employees and his wife (who, if I got the position, I would be working hand-in-hand with to run the office). We had a pleasant interview, about 90 minutes, and we covered every little detail I could think of … pay, benefits (no medical ), days off, hours, etc etc etc. We drank coffee (him) and hot tea (me), discussed my previous jobs, my references, my personality traits, yadda yadda yadda.

He made a HUGE deal over the references, stating the only reason he didn’t hire the last chick they brought in was because she only had one reference. I gave five personal and five business references, as well as my previous four employers.

When I left, I felt GREAT about the interview. I was sure he was going to be calling my references and checking them thoroughly, and I knew that all of them would give positive reports - most of them would give glowing reports. I was confident that I would hear back from him by the next morning, asking for a second interview.

I waited. And Waited. None of my references called me to tell me he had contacted them (they always do - they rock like that!). I waited more. By the end of the night, I was disappointed and frustrated. The next morning, i waited again … by noon, i’d given up. He wasn’t contacting my references, so the job is dead.

THEN, in the late evening, I receive a call. His wife wants to meet me now. He feels it is important for his office person and his wife to get along like bread and butter, because he doesn’t want any conflicts. He and his wife prayed over my resume and feel that I am a strong candidate … so could I please come in and meet with her?

Uh - YES! Please! Just gimme the freakin job already!

Tomorrow (today) … Thursday … March 13 … at noon.

Wish me luck. I obviously need it. And, if you’re the praying kind … please offer a little prayer for me too! We’ve been praying hard for things to turn around over the last couple of weeks, and it feels like maybe they have started … but a little extra prayer from any of you would certainly help my case!

G’night

I knew the posting nearly-daily wasn’t going to be kept up. I’ve had several moments where I thought, “Oh, need to blog that!” But I didn’t.

So, this is a filler blog. In the next day or two, I shall blog about:

1. The job interviews that sucked
2. The notice we received on our house (did i blog that already?)
3. The house we HOPE to rent next
4. The interview that rocked …
5. Cookie deliveries
6. Moving

And … hopefully, I shall be able to blog about
7. The New Job.

Here’s keeping up hope.

Until later …

Blogged with Flock

I had an ex who had researched many different kinds of beliefs and religions, searching for the ideals that would help him develop to his best potential, and the group of people who would accept him unconditionally. One of the things that he spent some time researching was Numerology (click to read an introduction to Numerology).

Although he gave me a book on Numerology, I never read it - despite my best intentions and mild curiosity. The book, is in fact still on my shelf, despite my many moves since that relationship. I keep hoping one day it is a book I will actually read.

Tonight, though, @Scandalous (one of the interesting people I follow on Twitter) mentioned that her Power Number is 4. This got me curious, so I started delving just a little deeper.

I rather quickly found this article on determining your Power Number. I still needed more information, though, to ensure I properly calculated my Destiny and Life Path Numbers. Thanks to another quick Google search, I found a Numerology and Astrology Website that gives the breakdown of how to find your Destiny and Lifepath Numbers (among other things), as well as an overview of what those numbers indicate about your life.

• Side note: The Numerology and Astrology Website seems to be devoid of any mention of power numbers as far as I have found. What an odd conflict!

I am now going to calculate MY numbers and what they indicate about MY life (follow my links to play along and determine YOUR numbers and what they indicate about YOUR life ?):

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Let me begin with my Life Path Number. If you are playing along, add the numbers that represent your birthday until you come up with a single digit number. Start with 2 digits for the month, 2 digits for the day, and 4 digits for the year, which will give you a 4-digit number (MY mm+dd+yyyy=2011). Add those digits together to reduce the numerical representation to a one-digit number (in MY case 2+1+1=4), and I have my Life Path Number: 4.

• Side note: You may need to take this adding game a little further, though: for instance, if your original 4-digit number was 1993, you would add 1+9+9+3 and get 22, then add 2+2 and get 4.
• Side note again: 22 is one of the Master Numbers.

According Michael McClain’s Astrology and Numerology Website, my Life Path Number indicates:

The Life Path 4 suggests that you entered this plane with a natural genius for planning, fixing, building, and somehow, with practical application and cerebral excellence, making things work. You are one of the most trustworthy, practical, and down-to-earth of individuals; the cornerstone members of society. Indeed, as a Life Path 4, you are a builder of society. The cream of the crop in this Life Path can be a master builder in society. if you are among these highly talented people, you have an idealistic nature which is grounded in practical terms, allowing you to conceive grandiose, far-reaching schemes and carry them through to the end. If you desire and are willing to work for it, you can achieve enormous success, prestige, and fame. Obviously, everyone with a 4 Life Path does not become famous.

All with this Life Path have the ability to take orders and to carry them out with dedication and perseverance and many 4s live and work happily in this context. But so often, the 4 Life Path is the entrepreneur and manager in the community. In either role, you always demand as much from yourself as you do from others, and sometimes a lot more.

You have the kind of will power that is often mistaken for sheer stubbornness. You don’t think of yourself as dogged, but your honest beliefs and that ever direct speech makes you come across as completely unremitting. Once a decision is made, it will be followed through to the conclusion, right, wrong, or indifferent. You are very set in your ways and determined to handle things the way you are so certain that they should be handled. Your tenacity of purpose and ability to get the job done borders on obsession. You are a wonderful manager with a great sense of how to get the job done.

You are an excellent organizer and planner because of your innate ability to view things in a very common sense and practical way. This stems from a strong desire to be a perfectionist in your labor. Planning is necessary to avoid errors. It’s very likely that a 4 Life Path person invented the to-do list, because it is the rare Life Path 4 who doesn’t have one by her side at all times. Your life is programed in an orderly fashion permitting you to catalog and manage the flow of ideas and activities that fill your day. Indeed, you seem to function best when you are under the gun and facing a tough set of problems.

Loyal and devoted, you make the best of your marriage, and you are always the good provider. Friends may be few in number, but you are very close to them and once friendships are made, they often last a lifetime.

The number 4 is solidly associated with the element of earth from which it gains its strength and utter sense of reality. You are one of the most dependable people you know. If patience and determination can ever win, you are sure to achieve great success in life. Often, you are called on to take care of others; to finish what they have started. It may not seem fair and probably isn’t, but it may be the key to your accomplishment and reputation.

The negative side of the 4 can prove dogmatic to an excess, narrow-minded, and repressive. A lot of skin-deep people turn you off, and you lack the tact to keep your feelings from being totally clear to all around. Additionally, the negative 4 has a bad tendency to get caught up in the daily routine of affairs, missing the big picture and major opportunities that come along once in a while.

*Whew* First part of determining my Power Number is complete. Now, for the second half.

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McClain’s instructions on determining the Destiny Number stress that a person’s original birth name should be used in its entirety. You will not get an accurate reading by using a nickname, married last names, or pseudonyms. Do, however skip the Jr., Sr., etc.

Start by taking of your names separately (First, last, middle typically … though I know many of you have 5+ names on your birth certificate), and adding the values of each letter up, then reducing the value of each name to a single digit, which will then be added with the rest of your name values and also reduced to a single digit.

• • The first name is Devyl, represented by the numbers 4, 5, 4, 7, and 3. Add the numbers together: 4+5+4+7+3=23, and 2+3=5.
  • The second/middle name is Gyrl, represented by the numbers 7, 7, 9, and 3. Add the numbers together: 7+7+9+3=26, and 2+6=8.
  • The third/last name is Blog, represented by the numbers 2, 3, 6, and 7. Add the numbers together: 2+3+6+7=18, and 1+8=9.
  • Add the numerical one-digit representation of each name together: 5+8+9=22, and 2+2=4
  • The Destiny Number of the name Devyl Gyrl Blog is 4.

• Side note: there is a chart on this page that reduces each letter of the alphabet to a single digit to make your adding easier in the long run.

Here are the numerical representations of my full name:

• First Name: 1+5+7+5+3+5+1=27, and 2+7=9
• Middle Name: 5+1+7+1+9+8+1=32, and 3+2=5
• Last Name: 5+9+5+5+1+5+2+2=34, and 3+4=7
• The three names combined: 9+5+7=21, and 2+1=3
• The Destiny Number of my full name is 3

According to Michael McClain’s Astrology and Numerology Website , my Destiny Number indicates:

The number 3 Destiny suggests that the direction of growth in your lifetime will be toward a more creative and inspirational nature. This path also leads to establishing yourself as an inspiration person spreading optimism and cheerfulness wherever you reside or travel. The byword for the 3 Destiny is embracing the joy of living and helping others to do the same.

A large part of your mission in life centers around raising the spirits of your fellow man. This might be on a everyday small scale basis, or it might be by being on stage as an entertainer. Obviously, for most, the first more likely, but, this Destiny does incline you along a variety of lines that may include writing, speaking, singing, acting or teaching. For some the interest in and appreciation of the arts is there, but the creative pursuit of these interests might not arrive.

You also have the destiny to sell yourself or sell just about any product that comes along. You may indeed be a natural salesman as the 3 traits are always welcome in sales and public relations. You are imaginative in your presentation and a pleasure to be around.

As you mature you must become an optimistic person that seems ever enthusiastic about life and living. You are friendly, loving and social, and people like you because you are charming and such a good conversationalist. You must develop an ability to communicate effectively in order to inspire others. It is your role in life to inspire and motivate.

Friends are extremely important to the 3 Destiny, and you must develop the ability to be a true friend. Through this talent you will achieve success. Opportunities open for you as you become increasingly social.

The negative side of number 3 Destiny is superficiality. You may tend to scatter your forces and simply be too easygoing. It is advisable for the negative 3 to avoid dwelling on trivial matters, especially gossip.

YES! I have my Life Path and Destiny Numbers. Now I can determine my Power Number!

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Determining your Power Number as easy as adding your Life Path and Destiny Numbers together and reducing them to a single-digit number. My Life Path Number is 4 and my Destiny Number is 3. Hence, 4+3=7. My personal Power Number is 7, which means I am driven by Intuition. The following quote is from Numerology’s Power Number - How Life Influences Us by Keith Abbott, which I found on Ezine Articles.com:

Power (7) - Intuition

Your life is influenced by the ability to use intuition and to seek inner growth. Your life’s achievement is spiritual awareness, a philosophical outlook, an awareness of your individuality.

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You may be wondering (especially those of you on Twitter with me while I have spent the last three hours getting distracted by you & by IMs and emails while I tried to post this one! freaking! blog! ?snarf?) … where was I? Oh! You may be wondering why I took the time to post all of this craziness.

Usually, I find after reading my horoscope, or an explanation of personality traits common among astrological signs, that the descriptions are so vague that they could be construed to fit JUST ABOUT ANYONE. However, after reading my numerology blurbs, I find that most of what is described does not fit me. In fact, out of those two huge blurbs, the only things I think apply to me are:
Life Path Number (4):

• “Loyal and devoted, you make the best of your marriage, and you are always the good provider. Friends may be few in number, but you are very close to them and once friendships are made, they often last a lifetime.”
• “Often, you are called on to take care of others; to finish what they have started. It may not seem fair and probably isn’t, but it may be the key to your accomplishment and reputation.”
• “A lot of skin-deep people turn you off, and you lack the tact to keep your feelings from being totally clear to all around. Additionally, the negative 4 has a bad tendency to get caught up in the daily routine of affairs, missing the big picture and major opportunities that come along once in a while.”

Destiny Number (3):

• “As you mature you must become an optimistic person that seems ever enthusiastic about life and living. You are … loving … and people like you …” (The ellipses replace MOST of this sentence, which doesn’t apply to me … I’m loving, but not friendly. I do not socialize easily. People like me, but I am not charming, nor am I a good conversationalist!)
• “Friends are extremely important to the 3 Destiny, and you must develop the ability to be a true friend.”

I am not sure I agree with the Power Number (7/Intuition) assessment at all, but this one I’ll have to think about a little more than I am capable of at 5:00 a.m.

I do believe I have rambled quite enough for one blog, don’t you? I encourage all of you to look for your own Numerology specs and let me know how you think they compare to your actual life.

Resources:

Abbot, K. (2008). Numerology’s power number-how life influences us. Retrieved March 7, 2008, from http://ezinearticles.com/

McCain, M. (2008). Astrology and numerology. Retrieved March 7, 2008, from http://www.astrology-numerology.com/

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There are more people in New York City (7,895,563) than there are in the states of Alaska, Vermont, Wyoming, South Dakota, New Hampshire, Nevada, Idaho, Utah, Hawaii, Delaware, and New Mexico combined.

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Sharks and rays are the only animals known to man that cannot succumb to cancer. Scientists believe this is related to the fact that they have no bone - only cartilage.

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James Buchanan was the only president of the United States never to marry. During his term in office, his niece Harriet Lane played the role of the First Lady.

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