Have I mentioned lately that I really REALLY want a massage? A 1-hour hot stone massage would do my body so much good right now! Seriously - packing, moving, unpacking, cleaning. I am exhausted. It feels good. It is a great kind of exhaustion. I am also a little bummed. This is it, this is the last day. I am moving my living room furniture, finally. I had left it at the apartment so my roommates could use it until they were finished packing and moving. I was not in a rush to get it here, Tween and I had two chairs we had been using to relax and watch tv in for the last couple of weeks. We also had our beds here already, so the living room furniture was not imperative to us.
I think as ready as all of us are to have our own spaces … we’re also all a little sad about moving away. I am farther than the other two roommates - they still live in town. I moved to the next town over, which puts me five minutes (WOOT!) from BFF, but 30-40 minutes from my roommate siblings. I am feeling weepy. Ok, I need to catch a few hours of zz’s, because I have a long day ahead of me. I have SUPER heavy furniture, and it needs to be brought up three fights of stairs!!
~*~ Stolen from an email sent to me (last year) by my sweet Petunia.~*~
Two names you go by: 1. Mom
2. Devyl
Two things you are wearing right now: 1. Tank top
2. Slippers
TWO OF your favorite things to do 1. Hang with Tween
2. Read
Two things you want very badly at the moment: 1. A massage
2. And, thanks to my friend G who told me about a Tweet from Ellen Degeneres … a Brazilian wax. purrrrr
Two Pets that you have or have had 1. Rascal Lee Kitten - the feline member of our family.
2. Calle ~ one of our previous feline family members. She was special because she chose us. One day I’ll tell her story.
Two people who will fill this out: 1. My sweet Adelle
2. Perpstu (eventually)
Two things you did last night: 1. Caught up on Ghost Whisperers with Tween (they were TiVo’d for a couple of months)
2. Cooked dinner
Last thing you ate: Uhm, I am writing this a week ahead of time, but:
1. Dry toast
2. Yogurt
Two people you last talked to: 1. C (of course)
2. Tween
Two things you’re doing tomorrow:
Again, typing this a week ahead of time. However, I plan to 1. Enroll Tween in new school
2. Apply for a few jobs locally
Longest trips taken:
1. England (plane)
2. From NJ to FL, to NM, to San Diego, back to NM, to Tx, to FL again, to VA, and back to NJ. It was a 3-week trip. I drove, by myself, with Tween … who was 11 months old at the time. I loved it!
Your favorite holidays: 1. Thanksgiving … less for the official reason and more because it is a HUGE family gathering for us, with everyone bringing food and games. We set up a bonfire, play soccer or basketball, cook, eat, clean, and catch up. There are usually more than 30+ family members there, and I love seeing them in one place!
2. Any other holiday that brings family together and celebrates something bigger than ourselves.
Today (later, after I sleep), the roommates and Tween and I are all converging on the house we shared to scrub and scour and make it shine. We have lunch with Dad first, as he is moving south. That will be nice - we haven’t all had a lunch with Dad in a while. It gets a little chaotic, so we always go to a buffet - if we get an out-of-the-way table, it isn’t nearly as stressful as if we’re trying to fit into a sit-down service eatery.
The time is closing in … I have been moving for a couple of weeks now, but the official last day of our having a lease together is the 31st of March. Funny, how something that was such a cause of stress and strife can be so sentimental to me now. I really do love my roommates, and I will miss having them around to socialize with in the evenings. The quiet is nice - Tween and I are far quieter in day-to-day things than A & her boys. The space is lovely - my things are now spread throughout the apartment, and not crammed into storage spaces, and piled high in closets and in my bedroom. But Biggest Loser, Bachelor, and American Idol will not be nearly as fun when I am not watching it with my siblings!!
Funny, the last apartment we lived in was tiny compared to this one. We have stuff everywhere, spread out all over, and piled high … but there is still so much ROOM all over the place, and we do not feel crowded or stressed while we are here. A few boxes a day is my motto. I ask Tween to do a short list of things daily when she gets here, but I work throughout the day, taking my time. When I am not with BFF helping her, of course. It makes us smile and dance to say silly things like, “Just run by the apartment and grab it … you only live 5 minutes away!” Or, “I’ll swing by and get you on my way … because even if you were not on my way, you only live FIVE MINUTES from me!” We’re goofballs, I know. It really DOES make us happy though!!
What seems like a lifetime ago, my baby brother was born. I did not know it at the time, but my mother had just miscarried the year before, another boy. She and my stepfather had been trying for a few years to have a boy. All it meant to me was that I got to cuddle another little sweet bundle of coo, and that Mom would let me help take care of him. Steven brough joy from his first moment of life. He grew up to be an all-star sport player (thrilling my stepfather) and a conscientious young man (thrilling my mother). I was always a second mother to both of my siblings: my parents relied on me heavily to be responsible for them and help out around the house. I never knew that they appreciated my help with the kids until the year 2000, when my brother was 16 years old. June 29th - a day I was celebrating because it was my BFF’s baby girl’s 1-year birthday (although C & Lil B had moved back to FL, I still had a cupcake in her honor). After work, I went to the local hangout with my shipmates, and we were singing Karaoke and flirting and being silly. My phone rang, and a quick glance told me it was my folks. Something told me to answer, despite the noise and rowdiness of my surroundings. I dashed outside, my body feeling heavy and my heart racing. I answered, but I couldn’t hear anything on the other end. Suddenly I heard a loud sob coming from my stepfather. Screaming now, I asked “Are you okay? Dad? Are you okay? Do I need to call 911? Dad!!” His response was another sob, with a “no” at the end. More sobbing. “Dad, is it Mom? Is Mom Okay? DAD!! What’s wrong?” My friends were surrounding me, my current boyfriend had wrapped his arms around me to support me because my knees had given out. “Dad? Is it T (my sister)? Tell me! What is wrong?!?” He broke, the sobbing becoming louder, his voice finally breaking through. “It’s Steven. Angel! It’s Steven! Our baby boy. He’s …” Again, his voice broke, his sobbing increased. “Was there an accident? Is he okay? Is he in the hospital? Dad? Dad you have to tell me. I can’t help if I don’t know. Take a deep breath. Let’s figure this out.” “He’s .. he’s … he’s gooooooone! Angel, he’s gone! You have to come home. Our baby boy is gone. Please come home. I called the Red Cross. Your command will be notified soon. Go, make arrangements. You have to come. I’ll buy the tickets. Get your baby girl, come home to us. We need you here. Your Mom needs you.” I leaned against the brick wall of the building, my boyfriend holding me. I couldn’t cry, I was in shock. I knew something bad had happened - dad never cries. But gone? Dead? It crushed me. I had to call Tween (who was very young at the time), and tell her we were taking a trip. Her father’s girlfriend met me at the airport with her, and stayed with me while I told Tween what was really happening. After I finished, she said she needed to talk to God “right now!” I explained that she could talk to God anytime she wanted, and that He was always listening. She said no, she had to SEE Him. “RIGHT NOW.” I asked why, and she told me that she had to tell God to give her Uncle Steven back. We weren’t finished with him. He didn’t do everything yet. For the first time since receiving the news the night before, I cried. My baby girl had put into words exactly what we all felt. She held my hand, hugged me, and said, “Let’s go. We have to help Grandmommy and Grandaddy and Auntie.” We went home, and when I walked into the house, my Mom wrapped her arms around me and said, “Our little boy is gone. You were his second mother. I am so sorry we didn’t keep him safe. I’m so sorry you didn’t get to see him again.” She was worried I would be upset with her & Dad. I have to say, Tween was AMAZING through the whole week. She stayed out of the way, she colored in corners and got drinks and food for people. When she saw or heard crying she would get me so I could go console whoever needed to be consoled. She brought love and hugs and kisses to all of the friends, family, and neighbors who came to pay their respects and visit with us. She was AMAZING. Not once in my life have I met a child under the age of five who could display such gentle, nurturing, sweet, and caring mannerisms. She touched hearts. And then told everyone it was because Uncle Steven told her to help. Today would have been my brother’s birthday. Today, he would be 25 years old. Today I think of him and see him playing Major League Baseball for the Braves in Heaven. Steven ~ We love you, all the way to Heaven and back a kazillion times over. Happy Birthday, baby brother.
As a single woman, I rarely “miss” sex … but every once in a while, even ~I~ need to feel that delicious “O.” I recently spent some time browsing around PinkCherry.com and chose a new toy. I wanted something small but powerful - something that could easily be carried around without necessarily being noticed or questioned. I found this cute lil gyrl: Mia by Lelo.
I received her a short time later, but she happened to be delivered right smack in the middle of my computer problem/lease ending/packing & moving turmoil. I kept looking at the box, sitting on my dresser, and wishing I had 1) a computer to charge her with and 2) the privacy to test her out.
Last night, I finally got my wish. I connected her to my USB port while I chatted on one of my favorite social networks, and in just a little while later she was charged up and ready to rumble! Have I mentioned how cute she is? *Grins* Not much larger than a finger, actually. A little fatter, and smooth … i love the smooth feel.
The lovelies at PinkCherry.com had tossed in some lube with my purchase … but lube is not something I have needed (yet?) … Mother Nature was kind enough to supply me with a sweet little fountain that provides a hot, moist oven that is easily warmed.
I turned on my pretty red lamps (I’ve bragged about them before, I am sure), closed my curtains, closed my door, and hopped into my lovely, comfy bed .. naked (of course!), ready to test Mia out.
I started out just getting to know her - powering her up, feeling her different levels, thinking about what she would feel like nuzzled against my sweet spot as opposed to my index finger. I let Mia’s tip rest against my nipple for a moment at her lowest setting, then increased the power slightly. I was surprised to find that my nipple responded, slowly becoming erect, and that i could feel the warm tug all the way through to my lower belly.
Shifting slightly against my pillows, I slid Mia down between my legs, and rested her lightly against my lips, allowing her to tease me slowly. Her powerful vibrations quickly opened my flowing fountain, and I pressed her between my lips with one finger, guiding her towards my sweet spot, playing with her vibration levels, and enjoying the delightful tightening heat she encouraged my body to experience.
I could have continued to experiment with Mia’s vibration levels and my “pulse” points for much longer, but after several delightful moments, I gave into the waves of pleasure she stirred up within.
Soon, I will have to browse PinkCherry.com for a new toy … but I think Mia and I have a few more sessions to enjoy before then!
I know some of you are wondering what all the fuss is about … so hop on over to PinkCherry.com and find your own pleasure power tool and enjoy the experience!
For those of you who want to know, Mia charges via the USB port, and emits only a soft purr of a hum. She has a smooth, cool exterior, arrived in her own little storage box, and comes with a small (mine is white) storage pouch.
From time to time, friends will mention having difficulty getting their kids to go to sleep at bedtime. I know Tween has sometimes pulled silly stunts, like sneaking a flashlight under the covers to read (how do you get angry when she’s READING???), or playing her DS (which was taken away for a month), or texting her friends (she had to start plugging it in out in the L.R. where I could see it at night).
For the most part, though, I have known how lucky I am when it comes to bedtime with Tween. When she was about 5 months old, I could tell her to get her blanket and pillow and lay down for sleepytime. She was crawling at that point, so she would drag her blanket to her pillow and lay down, promptly falling asleep.
She hit a rough patch when she went through her terrible two’s (17-28 months old). I was working 12-hour shifts (U.S. Navy), picking her up from daycare, and getting home at 8pm. I needed her to get to sleep so I could make our meals for the next day (I had to provide hers, since she was at daycare for so many hours), get her diaper bag ready (she was potty trained, but we used the bag for other necessities), clean the house, mow the lawn … whatever needed to be done. I would let her stay up til 9pm, then we would wake up at 5 a.m. so I could spend a little time with her. These were miserable days: 2 hours a day I would get to see her, spend time with her. She was feeling the stress, I was feeling the stress … so after a week of her fighting me on bedtime til 2 a.m., and us only getting 3-4 hours of sleep, I was at my wit’s end. I called my Mom, BEGGED her to take Tween from me. Promised to send money, food, clothes, whatever. Swore I could not do it, I was an awful mother, I could not handle being a single Mom anymore, and that if she did not take Tween, I would invite her father back into my life JUST TO HAVE THE HELP.
Mom talked me down from my hysteria, and talked Tween into bed over the phone. I do not know what she said to her, or how she said it … all I know is, I did not have trouble anymore. She snapped out of her terrible two behavior, she turned back into the little angel she had been previously, and things ran smoothly for a few more years.
When I invited Tween’s sister’s mother (heh - can you follow that? My estranged husband - who I did not want back, btw - had a relationship with another woman, who then bore him a daughter) to live with Tween and I (the mother and my ex had volatile fights, and it was unhealthy for BOTH of her girls - she had one when she entered the relationship, who was approximately the same age as Tween), there was another adjustment period. The girls would giggle and laugh, talk, and try to play in bed. Once we got their schedules structured though, the problems went away again.
Yes, I count my blessings when it comes to the bedtime blues. I know I am lucky, and I know I am blessed to have such a well-behaved child. Someone, somewhere, was smiling down on me when they assigned this sweet angel to me … I do not know if I could handle a child who constantly tested my inner strength and temper!
I snagged this from an email my sister sent me 8ish months ago.
40 ODD Things about you!
1. Do you like cheese? I like cheese on spaghetti, but not burgers. I like string cheese. And white melted cheese dip at Mexican eateries. I ? grilled cheese sammiches, but do not necessarily like cheese on meat sammiches. Sometimes, I like cheese cubes at parties. I love nachos, and prefer when diced jalapenos are mixed right into the cheese sauce.
2. Have you ever smoked heroin? No! I do not even think I know anyone who has! Nor do I have any interest in doing so.
3. Do you own a gun? No, I don’t. I do not have any interest in doing so, either.
4. Your favorite song?
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointment? No, not that I realize.
6. What do you think of hot dogs?
I like the all-beef hot dogs, and I prefer them without the casement. I do think gas station hot dogs are yummy though … I get them once or twice a year when I am craving the hot dog heart attack!
7. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Water. Cool and fresh. Yum!
8. What is your favorite piece of jewelry?
I rarely wear jewelry, and no longer have favorite pieces.
9. What one trait do you hate about yourself? I dislike the word, “hate.” I very strongly dislike my temper, though. It is short-fused and explosive. However, I do not hold grudges, nor am I vindictive and petty. There is an upside to everything, right?
10. What is your middle name? My friends know it. Others do not need to know.
11. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment…
A. Poor Rascal Lee is not sure of his new home.
B. I wonder what we should have for dinner?
C. It is a beautiful day outside.
12. Name 3 things you bought yesterday.
A. Curtain rod.
B. Spaghetti sauce for C’s house.
C. Dress for Tween.
13. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink. Water, Sweet tea, Water.
14. Current worry right now? How much do I **need** to make to stay afloat?
15. Current hate right now? Again, not fond of the word, “hate.” Maybe if “hate” were not such a common word, people would focus more on how to control their emotional reactions to things they do not like.
16. How did you celebrate the New Year?
With friends. We ate dinner, had yummy snacks, watched the kids play the Wii, watched a movie with the kids, and toasted the new year with champagne (adults) and sparkling grape juice (kids). Was a lovely evening, indeed!
17. Where would you like to go? New Zealand, Jamaica (again and again and again!), Machu Picchu, and oh-so-many other places!
18. Name one person who will complete this?
NAMG, unless she has already posted this as a MeMe at some point.
19. Do you own slippers? A few pairs … I prefer the flip-fop style fuzzy slippers though, especially when they have extra padding in the soles.
20. What shirt are you wearing? Brown tank top.
21. Can you whistle? On a good day, I can whistle a bit. Most days, no.
22. Favorite color? The color of the trees, the grass, flower stems, plants, shrubs, and the Emerald Coast waters … green. In most shades and varieties, but especially in jewel tones and the bright color of wasabi.
23. Would you be a pirate?
Only if I could be the head of my own ship! It would have to be somewhat new, filled with comfort items, and clean clean clean!!!
24. What songs do you sing in the shower?
I was well-informed about my lack of signing ability as a child, and I got in trouble anytime I tried to sing in the shower. I still do not feel comfortable singing in the shower, although if I am in an extremely good mood, I’ll string together silly phrases in a sing-song voice.
25. Favorite girl’s name?
They change with my mood, but two remain the same: Christianne (what I would name my next daughter, if I were blessed with another girl-child), and Anika (a name I heard once and loved).
26 Favorite boy’s name?
Again, they change with my mood. I do not like common names, though.
27. What’s in your pocket right now? Not a thing.
28. Last thing that made you laugh? Tween: she woke up and announced the time. I am not sure why she did it, but it struck me as hilarious!
29. Best bed sheets as a child? I do not remember particularly liking any of my sheets. I do remember disliking (greatly!) the pink sheets my sister picked out, and that I had to use for more than 5 years!!
30. Worst injury you’ve ever had? Ankle: stress fractures, sprains, twists. One kind of injury after the other, consistently, for nearly 7 years. I was in a cast twice, on crutches four times, and had my ankle wrapped so many times I cannot count. I still have weak ankles, but my injuries are far less frequent.
31. Do you love where you live? I always love something about everything I do (where I live, where I work, what I have to do at any given moment). In this new apartment, I love that I can see the tree-tops across the highway, I love that Tween and I have plenty of space, and I love that it is only a five (count em: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!!!) minute drive from BFF’s house.
32. How many TVs do you have in your house? Two: one in the L.R., one in Tween’s room.
33. Who is your loudest friend? I am the loud friend. After me, I have no idea!
34. How many dogs do you have? Zero, zip, zilch, zed. I prefer cat-pets. Dog-pets are over-eager, think everyone loves them, and cannot poop and pee in a litter box without scattering the litter a mile wide. They also cannot sit still and cuddle without wiggling and jiggling and licking and thumping their tails.
35. Does someone have a crush on you? Doubtful! If they did, and they were smart, they would tell me.
36. What is your favorite candy?
Bite-size snickers, twix, or Reeces; I also like M&Ms (preferably peanut). I like other kinds too, but those are my four favorites. I do not buy them often, because if they are around, I WILL eat them.
37. Favorite sports team? *blinks*
38. What song do you want played at your funeral?
Something happy, something to encourage a celebration.
39. What were you doing 12 AM last night?
Watching Desperate Housewives off of the TiVo
40. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning? *sings* “It’s a great day to be alive!” ~ Travis Tritt
Have you thanked a soldier, sailor, or airman lately?
Those of you who have known me for a while know that I have many friends and family members in the service. Some have died, some have been injured, and some come home safely. No matter what part they play, no matter how much of their lives they give, and no matter how much distance is between us … I want them all to know I appreciate their part in keeping our country safe.
I do not agree with all of the political aspects of the war, but this has no bearing on the fact that I appreciate the men and women who dedicate their lives to keeping our nation safe and secure. THEY do not necessarily agree with what they are sent to do, but they do it.
There are hundreds of ways to participate in thanking a soldier (sailor/airman). Find one.
You know how the smallest little thing can alter your day? I call those things breadcrumbs. They can make or break you. They can help you realize that you have a choice to make: be thankful or be angry.
I have a lot of breadcrumbs in my life, and I try to appreciate them for what they are: opportunities to change my point of view. I received a postcard the other day from a friend I have not heard from in 9 years or more. He happened to be somewhere he knew I wanted to go, and it made him think of me. He spent a couple of hours tracking down mutual friends to get an address for me, and sent me a postcard of one of the particular things I had mentioned seeing. He was a casual friend, at best. But for whatever reason, I had made an impact on his life at some point … and now he has made an impact on mine. I have had a long and stressful couple of weeks, and not nearly enough sleep. I needed “happy thoughts,” and he provided them.
So, I am running out of things to blog about tonight. If you hadn’t noticed yet, I set up 4-5 blogs at a time to post … and tonight I am just dead-dog-bone-tired. Sigh. So much crapola to move and take care of, so many stores, so many times loading and unloading hundreds of boxes of cookies into the car to deliver … I really **really** want a massage dammit!
Anyway … I was wondering if anyone else watches American Idol? Every year I get addicted even though I try not to, and every year I have favorites that most of my friends do not like. This year is not any different. After this week’s performance episode (Tuesday night), my ranking from favorites~to~not are: Danny (purrrrr … he’s just enough geek/cutie/sexy singer mix to make me very happy *giggles*), Megan (quirky voice, beautiful girl … but needs to stand STILL … she cannot move like I cannot move, and it is ugly when she tries! *L*), Matt (piano Matt … dude!), Adam (ok, I dunno why, but I haz a lil crush … shushup, I’ve been informed … it doesn’t matter!), Alexis (I love her, even though she wasn’t great this week), Anoop (there is something about him … he rocks), Scott (another who rocked it out far more in auditions than in the last couple of weeks), Kris, Lil (she would normally be higher up, but she sucked this week), and Matt (he’s done. He was great during the auditions, but … he hasn’t rocked it out since then, and while I’d love to have a friend that could sing that well sing often, I’m over him in this competition).
Okay. When we started moving, the weather was cool but not cold, the skies were clear. Perfect!
Each day seems to hold a new surprise. I have a little car, so taking a carload at a time is … time consuming. But hey, it works, right?
I’ve had help: BFF’s hubby came one day and helped me haul two pickup truck loads of stuff from my old house to the apartment I’m renting now. He was AWESOME: this is not the kind of thing he likes to do on his very few days off, but he did it cheerfully and did not rush me. In fact, kept telling me to slow down although I knew he was anxious to get out on the water and go fishing. So to B: Thank you. I love you. You’re awesome!
BFF came down a few days ago and we filled my car and her 15-passenger van to the BRIM with all my “stuff” minus some larger furniture pieces. Holy COW I have stuff. Lots of it. What’s sad is, each time I move, I get rid of tons of “stuff” … furniture, clothes, games, toys, etc …
EEEEEGADS!
Anyway. I’m alive. This week we’ve been focusing on Girl Scout Cookie deliveries (i’ll be mailing them out to you far-away-folk early next week!). I have found a LOT of people who forclosed on homes and moved away. They, of course, are the ones who ordered 6+ boxes. Dude … don’t they realize I have to buy these cookies if they don’t pay me for them?
Next week, I should be online once a day for an hour or so. I may not get to talk to you directly, but I hope to put up a blog post and then check the social sites during that timeframe.
Today is my mother’s birthday. I hope she has a lovely and beautiful day. Tween and I will call her later, and surprise her, since we haven’t been able to call in a few weeks.
Also, happy birthday to my sweet lil love … she knows who she is. I hope you have a beautiful day, gyrlie. I know you will be completely spoiled!
You know, I was surprised to find I didn’t get winded going up and down three flights of stairs, since I have always had altitude issues, and I am verrrrrrrrrrrrrry out of shape. However, after a week and a half of going up and down the stairs carrying boxes and furniture … my back is protesting. LOUDLY. Ok, mebbe not loudly ….maybe just PAINFULLY.
