Random Thoughts and Musings

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Note:

This story is continued from yesterday’s post, Judgment Day. Thanks

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I stared at my (step)mother, unbelieving. This woman-the most open, accepting, generous woman I had ever known-was upset there might be a non-white child born into our family. I was devastated. Up to this point, I idolized my (step)mother.

I am happy to share she erased racism from her heart and mind soon after this incident. It took another year or so, but she learned the error of her ways. She even chose a predominantly black Church as her place of worship when she accepted Christ back into her life. In fact, when I went to Church with her and my brother … we were the *only* three white folk to be found.

After my (step)mother passed away, my Dad met another really nice lady. I love her, and she absolutely dotes on Dad. It makes me happy to know he has found another woman he clicks so well with, and who is absolutely devoted to him. We were at one of our family dinners (Lil Lady and I used to go over weekly, when we lived back home) one night, and Dad’s new lady was telling us a hilarious story.

Then, she made a comment about having to drive through a certain part of town. My fork stopped halfway to my mouth, I stared at her in shock, glanced over at my Dad, and back to her. She tried to quickly cover it up, and backtrack … but the moment had been ruined for me.

Another racist remark by someone I love and respect … will it never end?? The hardest part of the situation for me is although she’s a very accepting and non-judgmental person, she just did not understand the inappropriateness of referring to that part of town in the same way they did as kids, when segregation was still in effect.

I find that sad, and disheartening. I find it disappointing, and I am embarrassed to admit that there are so many narrow-minded people in the world. I wish more people would understand that just because you do not practice active racism (or reverse racism), it is NOT okay to make racist jokes or use derogatory terms, PERIOD.

I know I am raising my daughter with open-mindedness and love in her heart. She sees people, not colors or religions or some other boundary. She is excited to learn about new cultures, and she appreciates that there are different views in the world.

I am proud of her for keeping these views, despite being the victim of reverse racism in her old school and after-school program. She continued to reach out to the people who judged her, until she eventually developed a few friendships. It helped, of course, when they realized that we attended the same Church, and were accepted by their Preacher as family (as my brother was dating the Preacher’s daughter). *grins*

By the way, my friend Tonya in the last post? She and I are still in touch, too. We don’t talk often, but about 15 years after the last time we saw each other, she researched my name on the internet and found my phone number. She thought I lived on the East coast growing up, and looked for me in Jacksonville.

A twist in the story of her trying to find me: I had not ever lived in Jacksonville before - my family is from south, central Florida. My parents, siblings, and I lived in Tampa and Fort Walton Beach when I was in 3rd-5th grade, and again when I was in 8th grade, until a couple of years after I graduated high school. Ironically, I was stationed there at the time she chose to look me up.

Jacksonville is where she thought I had been living all along, but I had only moved there about a year before she contacted me. I was so excited to hear from her, and I cannot wait til one day I get to meet up with her again. For the last several years, she’s been working as a contractor in Iraq. One day, we’re going to get together and chat it up, just like old times.

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P.S. Don’t forget to stop by and donate a few buckaroos to help my friend Aidan and the rest of Team Taji in their efforts to collect enough school supplies for children to be able to attend the school they are helping to rebuild.

xoox